


Karma

by MeridianGrimm



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Gen, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, Spoilers for Amnesty ep 23, TAZ Amnesty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-11-09 03:24:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17993933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MeridianGrimm/pseuds/MeridianGrimm
Summary: After the shape-shifting abomination uses Bigfoot's form, Barclay is off Stern's suspect list, but the agent turns his attention on Ned instead.





	Karma

**Author's Note:**

> Based on [this tumblr post](https://ohducknewton.tumblr.com/post/182982955214/with-the-abomination-taking-on-bigfoots-form) by @ohducknewton, used with permission:
>
>> With the abomination taking on Bigfoot’s form, Barclay may honestly be off Agent Stern’s suspect list because Barclay _couldn’t possibly be Bigfoot, he was making me french toast when it happened!_
>> 
>> On the flip side though, Ned might be the number one suspect because now not only was he involved with the first Bigfoot video, but also when Bigfoot goes rampaging down main street, Ned straight up _disappears_  
> 

“Honestly, you deserve this.”

“I’ve  _apologized_ for the video, Barclay.”  Ned throws his arms up, exasperated.  “I just can’t believe that Agent Stern thinks  _I’m_ Bigfoot.  If I were actually a cryptid, why would I post a promotional video for the Cryptonomica with myself in it?”

“Money.”

“Well, point.  But if our federal friend here decides to follow me around, then the Pine Guard are going to have a hard time getting anything done.  No magic for Aubrey, no sword for Duck, no monster hunting at all.”

Barclay doesn’t look worried.  “Split up the party.  Have him catch you with that Chewbacca costume and a camera, and let Duck and Aubrey investigate on their own.  He’ll probably tail you for a bit, ask a coupla awkward questions, and then drop it when it’s clear that you’re not Bigfoot.”

* * *

Barclay’s gaze flicks to Stern across the room speaking urgently into the Lodge’s landline, and then back to an irritated Ned, who stormed in a few minutes ago and is pointedly not looking at the agent.  Barclay bites his lip to conceal his (probably vindictive) amusement. “Ned, what did you do?”

“Things may have… escalated.”

“Did you fail your roll?”

“Can’t get double-sixes every time, my friend, more’s the pity. I told him that I’d faked the Bigfoot footage for a boost in business, but then he started asking about where I was four years ago on the date of the last sighting.”

“And you were…?”

“Doing something I wouldn’t admit to a government official.  Have I told you where I got my .357 Magnum Revolver?”

“Yes.  Maybe lie, the next time Stern asks? I was under the impression you were good at that.”

“I  _did_.  Good lord, being hounded like this is becoming massively inconvenient.”

“Gosh, I can only imagine what being hunted in my own town is like.  It’s a good thing no one’s ever publicly announced my location on the internet.”

Ned doesn’t appreciate his sarcasm. “You’re enjoying this.”

“A little.” He relents, though, because Ned’s right about Stern making the Pine Guard’s mission more difficult.  “We can shift suspicion onto someone else, you know.  Do that a couple times and we’ll have Agent Stern running in circles all over Kepler.”

Ned huffs a surprised laugh, and then considers it, tapping his chin for a moment before a mischievous grin spreads across his face.  “Well, I happen to know a suspicious figure who arrived in Kepler recently and will also have no alibis for several of the older sightings.”

**Author's Note:**

> Lol, Ned's planning to blame Boyd and distract two birds with one stone, as it were.
> 
> Hit me up on my [tumblr](http://meridiangrimm.tumblr.com/) if you want to talk about The Adventure Zone.


End file.
